My Geriatric July 4, 2007

Of all the things I love, fireworks are among the list. This year I did not even see a sparkler held by a small child. I spend the dusk hours of this Independence Day driving up 17 on my way home. As sad as this sounds it is actually preferred to spending more time with my crazy great aunt. In my first hours in California I knew that there would be no getting out of spending my fourth with these crazy relatives. The first thing they told me was that I would be attending there celebration. So I went. Why?, I do not know. Ok, I know, It’s because I’m a sucker. These people really helped me out this summer and I feel like I should humor them because they are family. I got to their run down beach house at 4 (thanks to terrible traffic and my procrastination). We ate cold food that wasn’t supposed to be cold and they drilled me on my life. Just so we are clear, by they I mean Cornie- my grandpa’s sister. Art- Cornie’s husband. He has a doctorate in computer science and spends 9hr’s every day loosing money on the stalk market. Ellen- their daughter. She could possibly be normal if she had different parents. There was another couple and their child at the party, but they were also very strange old people. I think I’m going to start adding up all the time I have to spend with these people and make my mom find a way to get my time back. They are her relatives so it’s her fault. I hate spending time with them for 5 reasons. 1- they are old and old people creep me out. 2- they are dirty. 3- they smell bad. ( my great aunt smells like urine) 4- they are nosy and bitter about life. 5- they laugh about everything especially things that aren’t funny.